How can I change him?

How can I change him?
Sunday August 17, 2008

Hello Alice
I have been married for 12 years and together overall for 22 years, to a man who has been lying and cheating on me. He was unofficially diagnosed with malignant narcissistic personality. When I read the information about it I was floored as a lot of it rang so true particularly about him being a pathological liar and his obsession with other women. He has been looking up information on it etc and claims he wants to get help. Do they ever change or is this just another one of his lies to win me back?

AM: What about you who havn’t realized for 22 years that you were living with a pathological liar? Can you work on your blindness instead of trying to change him? We can’t change another person. Only he himself can change IF HE WANTS to. But apparently, he doesn’t want to change.