Question about an alleged Alice Miller quote

Question about an alleged Alice Miller quote
Saturday July 22, 2006

Hello,
Can you tell me if the following quote can be attributed to Alice Miller, and if so, what book did it appear in. The alleged quote is, “When dying of thirst, one would drink muddy water.” Thank you for your time and assistance. -P

From the team: Alice Miller says that she doesn’t remember in which of her books you will find this sentence but she did write it exactly as you quote. She wrote it to illustrate the fact that a mistreated child takes lies, beatings and other forms of abuse, like sexual abuse (muddy water) as if they were signs of love (clear water). Because without this illusion the child would not survive. But the tragic effects of having drunk poison appear in the later adults who continue to betray themselves and pretend that what they had to endure was right. Thus they do the same to their offspring.