anger and rage
Monday September 24, 2007
Dear Alice, I read your post for 15 september and I totally agree with you about feeling the anger and rage of the small child. However, I am puzzled by exactly how this works. What do I do with that rage and anger? I feel it and then I get on with my life. I cannot go around in a constant state of rage. Anger does not feel good when there is nowhere for it to go. Screaming at my parents would achieve nothing except a sore throat for me. I could get an axe and chop up all my belongings in a rage of temper but only I would suffer.
Please explain how feeling the pain of betrayal and abuse and my anger works on a practical level.
AM: You write about your anger as if it were an abstract notion or a container that you have to carry around without knowing what it contains. Would you mind to explain to us more specifically what you want to know from us by giving us one or two examples? For instance: You are angry, who made you angry? How? What has s/he done to you? What would you like to tell him or her? Are you free to say what you need to say or are you withholding your rage? Why? Are you afraid of being punished? What will happen if you show how you are feeling? Try to describe the situation you are experiencing at the moment and try to describe your feelings as precisely as you can.