no monster

no monster
Sunday October 12, 2008

Dear Alice Miller, I want to thank your hard work, and I would like you to help me understanding wish kind of person I can be???? I am really lost, and I am suffering.I am like most of the people an abused child wish degree, I have no Idea????? I became a mum my self and a step mum, and then I understood that the feeling I did carry all the way true this last tree years was just guilt and anger, I was horrible with my son, and I understood unfortunately why now, but I still straggle with my feelings and anger but I don’t understand WHY because if I know the route of my illness and the way I should be behaving why do I still find it hard to manage my self and anger???? why do I scare my children when I am out of control???? am I a real monster???? please do help me to find the way to take it out of me, I had no chance whit the psychotherapist I found, and I don’t have time because the children are growing and they need to be safe loved respected and I understood I am sure that there is some mum out there how are scared to face this truth, but I know that a help from you may take a lot of us out of the dark.Thanks for reading my email and also thanks for your answer in advance

AM: You are not a monster but by struggling with your feelings you can not FEEL and understand that they have good reasons. As you are afraid of hating your parents you hate your children. Many mothers do the same unless they summon the courage to SEE who really deserve their rage.