she eats me

she eats me
Friday November 09, 2007

Dear Alice Miller-
I am in a working environment that I don’t totally agree with- and I wonder if at times it has to do with the fear in my childhood that I feel this way….of if it is a toxic ‘work’ environment it is very hard for me to know what is past and what is present. It is very hard to seperate it out. I know that when I walk into a health food store or art store my whole body quiets down – and feels more harmonious. I guess it is hard for me to acknowledge myself and my feelings since in my family I learned htat everyone else was more important than me.
It helps to do inner meditation exercises- future self and inner child to get more of an idea where I am coming from at times – and it is always stand my ground quit the job or relationship that makes me angry.
but how do you quit a relationship with your mother?
It helped me to see that your painting helped you with yourself- because it was something if I understood you correctly-
it was something she didn’t have access to.
I feel as though my mother EATS me.
what she can understand.
and she cannot cannot eat what I write and she cannot eat. what I paint.
but she can eat my job
and all of the drama.

and it makes me sick how she does it.

Was painting helpful for you because it was in a language that was not ‘for’ your mother?
Can you help clarify this please.
Thank you very much for all of your work.

M. K. C.

AM: She could try to eat the child but can’t eat the adult unless you allow her to do so. Meditation doesn’t help, you must protect yourself CLEARLY by defending your limits and saying NO.